Husband Says He Hates Wife's Natural Hair And Wants Her To Go Back To Weave

NikkiGiovanni

Warrior Queen
just went on facebook and this article popped up....what a coincidence

Are People Intimidated When Black Women Have Natural Hair? | Naturally Moi

Toya Sharee recently published an article in Madame Noire about the stereotypes women face when they choose to wear their hair in natural styles. Even though it has been years since India Arie’s song, “I Am Not My Hair,” hit the radio waves, the assumptions many men make about women with natural hair have not evolved as much as one might think. Sharee writes the article based on both her own personal experience as well as that of her sister. Based on their experiences, it seems as though women who choose natural hairstyles go through their own process of accepting their hairstyles as gender appropriate as well as politically acceptable.

The way men respond to women with natural hair seems to sum up some of the assumptions made by the larger population. Sharee mentions a conversation she had with a male co-worker that shed some light on those assumptions. The co-worker admitted that men are intimidated by women who wear natural hair were and confident in a way that implies empowerment and confidence. He went on to say that this strong sense of self esteem means that men must approach these women differently because there is an implication that these women do not need men and desire to be approached with more substance than just a simple compliment or platitude. While Sharee admits that her co-worker made some valid points, she mentions that the way a women carries herself can imply the same sense of confidence and empowerment no matter what style she wears her hair in.

No woman should face prejudice and assumptions about who she is because of how she wears her hair anymore than a person should face prejudice and stereotypes based on the color of their skin, but the truth of the matter is that we live in a world where people do make assumptions based only on someone’s physical appearance without knowing anything else about them. Despite this fact, hopefully women feel liberated enough within themselves and their communities to wear their hair however they choose and embrace who they are naturally.
 

Swollen

Players Play I Coach
you want to tell this to your wife like this man did or you want to talk about womens hair ?

if you say something about womens hair as a man , just keep away with no word . non of your business and you could never understand .

Sometimes I does feel you deserve a good Kiss
 

dedetriniking

Registered User
Btw, I also got conned when I was 19 also, was bullin this girl, doing all sort of shit, place my hand in her head, felt all types of bumps, tracks, etc, I didn't know better, thought she had indian in her family given I bulled so many mixed, good hair black women back in sweet T&T so I didn't know better until I got to the states to realize these women or fake and trying to pass off a defective product as genuine, real tricksters son, shit, that was my wife, she better leave that shit in and don't let me know !
count yuh lucky stars that she didn't turn out to have a big moko in she pants too.
Now how da go look!?
 

trinifrombx

Registered User
The Black male mentality is poisonous to the Black community.
I am sort of shock and disappointed at your comment above, it seems like a carryover from hurt, other issues here, but I respect at times you keep it real unlike some uptight folks on here, can you speak to the issue of her breaking him in with a Brazilian Weave to her butt, then mad that this is the image she sold him then claiming she can't relate to him not liking the natural look....please speak to that !



Note, no logical black would or should be against against his woman going natural, but I am against radical changes if this is the look I know.
 

trinifrombx

Registered User
what the hell this gotta do with being man enough.. If you like that weave shit then you like the weave shit.. Maybe i find women saying that corny euro standard of beauty bullshit is done for and natural black hair is just as beautiful... what this gotta do with trickin somebody.. You mean you look at that woman and cant tell what she had on her head is not her real hair?

some ah yall put too much thought into this hair shit anyway...

if i found her face attractive with weave, then she gonna be attractive to me with short hair, natural hair, whatever... And if i didnt find her attractive in the first place i wouldnt have got wid her.. Aint no amount of weave gonna change up no womans appearance that drastically so i can be "tricked" as you call it and end up having the shock of my life when she goes natural...

and what the fuk i look like havin a discussion about what my woman is gonna do with her hair... let her do that with her sister and moms. thats womens talk.. what imma do next, sit down with her in the beauty palor with her and gossip with the girls too?

Well, isn't that the point......he like the weave that he met her in, so now what is the issue if that is what he want to see her in?

''
I think you implying the wife tricked the husband is a bit harsh. Its clear the husband find a black woman wearing her hair in a weave or a perm as being more attractive, and her sudden change in hairstyle would cause issues. If the situation was reverse, I can see a woman having issues, if her mate suddenly wanted to wear a perm, locs or braids.
Think about it, man met you with hair on your head, weave or natural, serious, you walk in the house with your hair shaved all off, you seriously don't think your spouse would have an issue with that ?

Note, I am not saying you can't do it, you have all rights to do whatever you want, but image, looks, matter to some as crony as some of these weak MF on here not willing to admit, it matters to me !
 

NikkiGiovanni

Warrior Queen
Well, isn't that the point......he like the weave that he met her in, so now what is the issue if that is what he want to see her in?



Think about it, man met you with hair on your head, weave or natural, serious, you walk in the house with your hair shaved all off, you seriously don't think your spouse would have an issue with that ?

Note, I am not saying you can't do it, you have all rights to do whatever you want, but image, looks, matter to some as crony as some of these weak MF on here not willing to admit, it matters to me !
you are way too emotionally invested in a woman's hair...you sound like a battyman
 

NikkiGiovanni

Warrior Queen
I am sort of shock and disappointed at your comment above, it seems like a carryover from hurt, other issues here, but I respect at times you keep it real unlike some uptight folks on here, can you speak to the issue of her breaking him in with a Brazilian Weave to her butt, then mad that this is the image she sold him then claiming she can't relate to him not liking the natural look....please speak to that !



Note, no logical black would or should be against against his woman going natural, but I am against radical changes if this is the look I know.

are you autistic?

only retards with autism have difficulty with change
 

trinifrombx

Registered User
what the hell this gotta do with being man enough.. If you like that weave shit then you like the weave shit.. Maybe i find women saying that corny euro standard of beauty bullshit is done for and natural black hair is just as beautiful... what this gotta do with trickin somebody.. You mean you look at that woman and cant tell what she had on her head is not her real hair?

some ah yall put too much thought into this hair shit anyway...

if i found her face attractive with weave, then she gonna be attractive to me with short hair, natural hair, whatever... And if i didnt find her attractive in the first place i wouldnt have got wid her.. Aint no amount of weave gonna change up no womans appearance that drastically so i can be "tricked" as you call it and end up having the shock of my life when she goes natural...

and what the fuk i look like havin a discussion about what my woman is gonna do with her hair... let her do that with her sister and moms. thats womens talk.. what imma do next, sit down with her in the beauty palor with her and gossip with the girls too?
''
I think you implying the wife tricked the husband is a bit harsh. Its clear the husband find a black woman wearing her hair in a weave or a perm as being more attractive, and her sudden change in hairstyle would cause issues. If the situation was reverse, I can see a woman having issues, if her mate suddenly wanted to wear a perm, locs or braids.
you are way too emotionally invested in a woman's hair...you sound like a battyman
Wow, a battyman, ok, I won't go there and call you a fat slob, I just won't do it !

You and a lot of these black women are bitter just because a black man like a certain look, a mature approach is to each his own, bitter so call fat black bullies like you always quick to point out how the Black man did the Black woman wrong, yet fail to call out the same weave wearing black woman who bait him into a Brazilian butt weave for all these years, now mad at him for liking what he is accustomed to...weave, so yes, you are a bitter fat black woman,and a hypocrite also who is quick to call out black man out while turning a blank look to the Black woman also, Damn fat hypocrite !
 

dollbabi

Earth Angel
That was a good show. I had no idea that Steve Harvey even had a show.

It's a shame the man feels that way. However, so many black men are extremely affected by european influences and feel their woman must fit european beauty standards as much as possible. Couple that with the fact that men often get thrown off by drastic change and this is the result.

All the best to her. Her hair looks good. Reality is that her husband has issues with his own hair. Hope they do not have daughters.
 

agroDOLCE

SweetfuhDayz
That was a good show. I had no idea that Steve Harvey even had a show.

It's a shame the man feels that way. However, so many black men are extremely affected by european influences and feel their woman must fit european beauty standards as much as possible. Couple that with the fact that men often get thrown off by drastic change and this is the result.

All the best to her. Her hair looks good. Reality is that her husband has issues with his own hair. Hope they do not have daughters.
this right here. def something to think about re: daughters.
 

LIONESS onda RISE

Registered User
Well, isn't that the point......he like the weave that he met her in, so now what is the issue if that is what he want to see her in?



Think about it, man met you with hair on your head, weave or natural, serious, you walk in the house with your hair shaved all off, you seriously don't think your spouse would have an issue with that ?

Note, I am not saying you can't do it, you have all rights to do whatever you want, but image, looks, matter to some as crony as some of these weak MF on here not willing to admit, it matters to me !
wow..i think you are missing the real and true point. Its just hair..and yes, he may like her brazillian weave, but that shouldnt be whats most important to him..or any man. if thats the case, thats a sad man and a sad relationship! Hair is a small thing that small ppl make into a BIG issue! what kind of message is he sending his wife? that her beauty (in his eyes) is tied into something of no substance? marraige is better or worse. what happens if she is in a debilitating accident that may result in scaring? loss of limb? or later in life develops cancer or some other illness? maybe lose a breast or..whatever? will he say he married a woman without health problems?...deal off?

Ppl grow and change.. if they cant GROW together, thats an issue..seems liket his man has reached his growth potential...and that is truely sad because if they only thing she is changing is her hair and thats a problem, then thats writing on the wall that he will allow them to fail the tests of time.

If you share his mentality....sad
 

trinifrombx

Registered User
That was a good show. I had no idea that Steve Harvey even had a show.

It's a shame the man feels that way. However, so many black men are extremely affected by european influences and feel their woman must fit european beauty standards as much as possible. Couple that with the fact that men often get thrown off by drastic change and this is the result.

All the best to her. Her hair looks good. Reality is that her husband has issues with his own hair. Hope they do not have daughters.
Allyuh you Black women are full of it........they both have issuess ,say what it is.........so whatc if they have a daughter, and ?

I t is amazing how some of you selfhating negros always trying to blame the black man !
 

trinifrombx

Registered User
wow..i think you are missing the real and true point. Its just hair..and yes, he may like her brazillian weave, but that shouldnt be whats most important to him..or any man. if thats the case, thats a sad man and a sad relationship! Hair is a small thing that small ppl make into a BIG issue! what kind of message is he sending his wife? that her beauty (in his eyes) is tied into something of no substance? marraige is better or worse. what happens if she is in a debilitating accident that may result in scaring? loss of limb? or later in life develops cancer or some other illness? maybe lose a breast or..whatever? will he say he married a woman without health problems?...deal off?

Ppl grow and change.. if they cant GROW together, thats an issue..seems liket his man has reached his growth potential...and that is truely sad because if they only thing she is changing is her hair and thats a problem, then thats writing on the wall that he will allow them to fail the tests of time.

If you share his mentality....sad
Good post........did you read all that I wrote ?

Sad...what is sad is thatcshe stated it, now beefing that he dont like the new look.

Where did I state I agree with him ?





My point is that she is shallow also and need to be called out also!
 

Missmayling

Registered User
Think about it, man met you with hair on your head, weave or natural, serious, you walk in the house with your hair shaved all off, you seriously don't think your spouse would have an issue with that ?

Note, I am not saying you can't do it, you have all rights to do whatever you want, but image, looks, matter to some as crony as some of these weak MF on here not willing to admit, it matters to me !
I am agreeing with you, but the husband's reaction was very childish.
 

agroDOLCE

SweetfuhDayz
Allyuh you Black women are full of it........they both have issuess ,say what it is.........so whatc if they have a daughter, and ?

I t is amazing how some of you selfhating negros always trying to blame the black man !
i took that to mean what is he going to teach his daughter(s) about beauty and loving herself the way she naturally made-- natural hair and all?
 

trinifrombx

Registered User
Lioness, smh......btw do you realize what you are saying ? Do you realize that Black women have turned the hair Business in a multi Billion dollar industry world wide?


Why you not calling them out on that......damn hypocrisy also!

Meaning hair matters to Black women.
 

LIONESS onda RISE

Registered User
but image, looks, matter to some as crony as some of these weak MF on here not willing to admit, it matters to me !
Good post........did you read all that I wrote ?

Sad...what is sad is thatcshe stated it, now beefing that he dont like the new look.

Where did I state I agree with him ?





My point is that she is shallow also and need to be called out also!
yes i read what you wrote, and your last sentence stood out..you agreed that image and looks matter, even called anyone unwilling to admit it as WEAK....but im thinking its more image cuz the woman still looks good..(looks are subjective, image usually isnt)..

The woman isnt shallow, she may be seen (by some) as selfish for not wishing to indulge her husband wants re her hair, but shallow? its HER head..and her husband shouldnt really care much..its kinda weird how invested some blk men are with women and how SHE (wife, woman, girlfriend) wears her hair....all styles are not maintainable. Weaves do permanent damage over time and i can understanding a woman saying..enough is enough and try to preserve her hairline/folicles..
 
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