Shouting out single mothers on Father's day.. what say you?

ladyrastafari

Notchilous
i dont think anybody is stopping minx from having her say.. i think people are saying, the same way she feels she is entitled to her opinion about the issue, others feel the same.. and peopel, single mothers, AND otherwise, really feel that this phenemenon is distasteful every Father's day... and peopel are starting to speak up about it.. that's all.. she can say wahtever she feels. she is not the rep for single mothers worldwide because there are others who do not share her views.. who ARE single mothers..
 

ladyrastafari

Notchilous
and as for what you said about there being single moms who have no positive role models in their kids life.. thats unfortunate but on days like father's day simply ignore it.. better you keep it to yourself and do it up REALLY big for mother's day... than come across bitter and jaded on father's day when nobody wants to hear or cares about that..
 

Minxy

New member
u stay deh and tell people what to feel, when you haven't walked a day in their shoes...thats a great look :kicks....:drag:
 

ladyrastafari

Notchilous
the irony of that is not lost on me.. take your own advice then maybe one day i'll hear yuh.. until then. lol.. ..

i aint tellin nobody what to feel. dem cud be bitter.. but as i told people straight up when i make my fb status any single mother coming on my status to talk about deadbeats or big herself out, is going to find out what time it is.. and this year.. i didnt see it at all.. lol. they learn..
 

LIONESS onda RISE

Registered User
u stay deh and tell people what to feel, when you haven't walked a day in their shoes...thats a great look :kicks....:drag:
I am beyond stunned that u could make such comments about blac women when u haven't walked a single day in her shoes...but it looks great on you?

True irony
 

EloquenceInc

Get your passport & come !
Me personally... i'm not for that.. i dont shout out any single mother's on Father's day.. i shout them out on Mother's day, a day for mothers.. I personally think it makes the mothers who do it, seem a lil bitter (which they would have reason to do) but to me it takes away from the fathers and other male figures who stand up for the children.... if you're a single mother i'd think that if there were male father figures in your child(ren)s life that you could use the day to shout them out as well.. your father, brother, cousins, uncle, child's godfather ... that's the day to show them some appreciation.. i mean if people do it on their FB wall then whatever, i dont object..but on my page.. when i make a post about fathers and people rush to shout out single mothers, its' like? damn y'all want mother's day and father's day too? get off my status!

and i just noticed that Mahogany cards (usually marketed to African Americans) has a section for that.. so is this deadbeat phenomenon getting to be a normal thing and in such abundance that marketing is growing for this?
No! And I agree with all you said!

And I stayed off fb for the most part on father's day cause i was going to seriously consider unfriending anybody who try to act like I must be this beast of burden carrying loads I was never designed to manage! No matter how they trying to make women feel special at the expense of men, it is very obvious all around us no matter how much MONEY they grow up to make or how they stay out of JAIL the effects of people growing up without being exposed under their same roof to the normal workings of a loving relationship (with the normal ups and downs) between a man and woman!

People keep acting like the fathers are some kind of disposable add-in like an Explorer or Chrome widget that you don't really need...yes you do...if he is abusive or otherwise not able or willing, you might be safer or whatever without THAT particular father, but the child still will have a gap in there that only a father (blood preferably but any proper figure that has the right example relationship with the mother, I don't even count grandfather types cause the kid still doesn't get the proper example of how his mother should be treated by the male role model in his life) will be better than a big empty space in the development process where the man should be.

I'm not sure why single women hate hearing that. Just because someone is not present doesn't suddenly mean they are therefore not necessary. It just means you are working off a handicap. You do the best you can but you don't get delusional and kid yourself that the lack of a father is no big deal. Kid's life might be more stable in a single parent household if the single parent have sense and the absent parent have issues, but that does not change that the child will still have a void only a father can fill, if the absent parent is the father. This is true whether the father died, got incarcerated, is a prisoner of war, ran off with the secretary, divorced, mentally ill, wasn't told he had a child out there in the world, molested or otherwise abused the child and so is kept away, or simply lives 2 streets over and doesn't business with the kid...some reasons better than others, they all still lead to the same lack of a father for the child.

Pretending otherwise to get more accolades and more pats on the back is a little too much vanity and attention whoring and not enough seeing the reality of running to claim superman and superwoman title for me.

My own job hard enough not interested in anyone else's.
 

Lucianite

Registered User
To shout to mom out father day is NOT the cause of absentee father
And don't see how it promotes it

The shout out is a mere result or symptom, if you will ....

It's seems its really meant to further highlight what the single mms are doing. Its done outbof love qnd recognition. Women don't usually opt to be single moms to get recognized on Father's Day.

How is wishing single moms happy Father's Day encouraging absent fathers ? We fathers have to take the responsibility to be fathers period. With no excuses.
 

Lucianite

Registered User
Where is the opinion of the single mothers who get writhed happy Father's Day ?

And kids who appreciate their moms and find it fitting to wish them such ?
 

EloquenceInc

Get your passport & come !
To shout to mom out father day is NOT the cause of absentee father
And don't see how it promotes it

The shout out is a mere result or symptom, if you will ....

It's seems its really meant to further highlight what the single mms are doing. Its done outbof love qnd recognition. Women don't usually opt to be single moms to get recognized on Father's Day.

How is wishing single moms happy Father's Day encouraging absent fathers ? We fathers have to take the responsibility to be fathers period. With no excuses.
There is no FURTHER highlight needed. Let the men have their shine and if it don't apply I sit my backside down off to one side and read up on my personal finances or something. A nuh EVERYting mankind MUST inna...we need to go back to the days of letting some things and some hype PASS us!

Where is the opinion of the single mothers who get writhed happy Father's Day ?

And kids who appreciate their moms and find it fitting to wish them such ?
You just read one. At least that use to be the case. I got wassy enough about it up to last year that no one stressed my wall this year...nor my phone...yay.
 

Lucianite

Registered User
Again it's a symptom of an issue ..... It in no way impacts or creates the problem....

The problem of an absentee father exist so some people get creative in dealing with a situation


Father's Day will always exists and fathers will always be honored so how it taking away from fathers


Responsible fathers get their due
 

Lucianite

Registered User
Is you reaction typical ?

Or an outlier and overreaction ?

Some mothers take it out of love . and recognition as it is intended .....
 

EloquenceInc

Get your passport & come !
Is you reaction typical ?

Or an outlier and overreaction ?

Some mothers take it out of love . and recognition as it is intended .....
Needing "further" praise after just getting hyped up on Mother's Day and by virtue of single mothering every other day of the year...is the overreaction.

Whether the masses doing it or not, it's being too NUFF.

It is called father's day. Anyone, anything, that did not make a baby using ejaculations from their penis needs to hold a tight corner an mek di father dem pass through... Simple as that. If we want to make it slightly more complicated we can add the requirement that they actually participated in their child's life after creation...but that's as far as it goes and still includes zero females in the equation of the day's celebrations...
 

Lucianite

Registered User
If those card don't exists or no child ever wishes mom a happy Father's Day ever agin Will the absentee father cease to exist or not be a problem or even become less prevelant ?
 

ladyrastafari

Notchilous
To shout to mom out father day is NOT the cause of absentee father
And don't see how it promotes it

The shout out is a mere result or symptom, if you will ....

It's seems its really meant to further highlight what the single mms are doing. Its done outbof love qnd recognition. Women don't usually opt to be single moms to get recognized on Father's Day.

How is wishing single moms happy Father's Day encouraging absent fathers ? We fathers have to take the responsibility to be fathers period. With no excuses.
who said it is encouraging absent fathers? :confused:... i asked whether there is such a gap that it's become now a viable market that cards are now being produced for this occasion..

most single moms that i know who dont care for the father's day shout outs are the ones to keep their lives out of the public eye... the ones i see making a special effort to talk about "having to do the job of both mom and dad".. put their business on front street lol
 

ladyrastafari

Notchilous
and Lucianite.. while most of the mothers appreciate what people are trying to say.. a lot tell you flat out that they aren't any father, and they're celebrating THEIR father on that day lol.. ive seen this a lot lol..
 

ladyrastafari

Notchilous
If those card don't exists or no child ever wishes mom a happy Father's Day ever agin Will the absentee father cease to exist or not be a problem or even become less prevelant ?
i guess back in the day it wasnt the thing to be proud of.. being a single mother.. so nobody was really going out of their way to let the world know that daddy aint there.. whether he was simply in another country or another state.. or another street.. it just wasnt something you brought attention to..
 

Lucianite

Registered User
Based ont the cards shown "to my mom " there iexists a market where children have the choice to show love to their mom on any cccasion they chose.....

And I would imagine most momswold accept in love.....
 

EloquenceInc

Get your passport & come !
most single moms that i know who dont care for the father's day shout outs are the ones to keep their lives out of the public eye... the ones i see making a special effort to talk about "having to do the job of both mom and dad".. put their business on front street lol
^This.

and...mahogany's new little trick with those cards is the type of thing that forever makes black people in general get looked at as an unintelligent underclass...why don't the creative heads behind those tasteless cards know to let certain situations just pass without the trumpets and the neon lights? There are VARIOUS reasons why a woman can end up a single mother, none of it means pretend like it's a glorious thing for a child to be without a father.

No wonder the dyke dem start mek di pickney dem call dem daddy. My bad, there's a card for them too! smh
 

ladyrastafari

Notchilous
yes.. and i'm sure that is the truth. but also by that token, this means that single motherhood is so widespread that children are forced to give their mothers cards on FATHER"s Day.. and this card is produced by Mahogany.. a card company traditionally marketed to African Americans.....look at this discussion.. (read the comments)

Hallmark “Mahogany” Father’s Day Card For Mother’s Sparks Debate | Bossip

The Mahogany Father’s Day card stirs the pot for another year…

Hallmark “Mahogany” Father’s Day Card For Mother’s Sparks Debate
Yesterday, we came across yet another brief discussion that was sparked surrounding a Father’s Day card (pictured above) created by popular Hallmark-affiliated brand “Mahogany,” which was developed to appeal specifically to African-American consumers.

The outside of the card, which reads “For My Mom On Father’s Day,” left a few folks feeling that Mahogany’s decision to sell this card for the umpteenth year in a row was a blatant attempt to continue capitalizing on the negative single mother/absent father stereotype that society often associates with the African-American community.

On the other side of the debate were those who felt that the card was a genuinely heartfelt gesture that gave those in the community without fathers present in their lives for whatever reason the chance to let their mothers know that they too are appreciated on this day for stepping into the role of both parents as best they could.

While many single parents do in fact step into the role of the missing parent everyday, many debating the topic also felt that women can’t be fathers or teach young boys how to be men and fathers can’t be mothers or teach young girls how to be women, so fathers should be able to be celebrated on their holiday without having to share the day with single mothers and vice versa.

An additional point was made that Hallmark also sells similar cards that are not marketed towards African-Americans for people without both parents.

So what say you, Bossip fam? Is Mahogany trying to make money by reinforcing a negative stereotype that undermines black fathers and families? Or is the card nothing more than a positive gesture meant to provide an option for those without both parents who want to show their mother appreciation on Father’s Day?

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